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Debbie Does Dallas Again

Dillan Lauren is holding a Xerox of someone's tits. "These are yours, girl!" she shouts to the skinny production assistant who handed her the paper. The production assistant steps back from the soundstage shaking her head. "Come on, admit it!" Dillan has a throaty laugh. "They look like fried eggs," comments Gia Gordon, sitting opposite Dillan and co-star Trent Tesoro in a makeshift receptionist area.

Unseen in the next room, behind the cameraman, a surprisingly tuneful voice sings "You Were Always on My Mind". It's director and porn veteran Paul Thomas, who's helming the newest installment of the ongoing hardcore saga Debbie Does Dallas. His casualness comes from the fact that he's already directed four Debbie pictures, most recently last year's Debbie Does Dallas: East vs. West, starring Sunrise Adams.

"It's the misadventures of Debbie," Thomas answers when asked about the plot of this particular version of the cheerleader classic, which stars new Vivid star and former Girls Gone Wild model Stefani Morgan. "In this one she's raising money to go to the nationals. It's a take-off on Bye Bye Birdie," he adds, citing the comedy starring Dick Van Dyke, Janet Leigh, and Ann-Margret about a rock singer visiting a small town to film his farewell performance before getting drafted into the army. "It's a small video production," Thomas says. "We're going to do a big fancy Debbie movie at the beginning of next year."

Dillan is passing the idle time between shots by pressing her naked breasts against the glass partition in front of the receptionist's desk. "That's going to give me masturbatory fodder for the week," cracks Gia behind rectangular black-framed glasses, with a large white cowboy hat over her jet-black hair. She'll soon be naked and bound to that receptionist chair.

Entertainium Studios is located in a commercial strip of Downtown Los Angeles. Its theme rooms include a jail cell, a strip bar with a series of shiny poles mounted on a raised stage, and the prerequisite bedrooms. At night the space houses LA Couples, a swingers club. The rules are posted on the front door: "Dress code: smart upscale, no jeans, sportswear, tennis shoes, or baseball caps." That pretty much sums up the attire of the crew working today that are also breaking regulation number two: no cameras.

Thomas, riding a surge of improvisational creativity, orders Gia out of her clothes and sends his production crew on a mad rush for rope. Two tattooed members of the crew bind and gag her naked to the receptionist chair. They look like they've done this before. Thomas wants Gia to struggle and try to stand. "I can't," she mumbles, chewing the rope in her mouth. "The rope hurts my cunt."

"This doesn't make any sense," protests Stefani, dressed in stiletto heels and little else except the outline of her thong beneath a thin, short dress. "It's just funny," Thomas retorts. "It doesn't have to make sense."

She takes a look at Gia and observes, "You actually look really cute." One of the production people hands Stefani the ball-gag that they passed over in favor of the more traditional rope. "I've never been ball-gagged before," she notes after taking the thing out of her mouth. "I'll shut up if you tell me to shut up." This makes Dillan laugh and her natural breasts jiggle in the black push-up bra she's wearing under a tight, belly-exposing yellow shirt. She sports a tattoo of an eye on the small of her back, just above her round behind held tightly in low-rider jeans.

"You're not sticking your fingers in my ass," she says in response to the scene going on in the next room, where Steven St. Croix is being introduced to Stefani with his pants around his ankles. "You can stick a cock in my ass, but not fingers. That's a waste of time."

Things are getting silly. The crew has been working since ten o'clock and it's already past six in the evening with no end in sight. Nick Manning and St. Croix sit around talking about which anti-balding cream is superior. St. Croix is dunking a towel in a bucket of ice water to use to cool off during the coming sex scene with Dillan.

It's day four of the five-day shoot, but the talent is still excited. Dillan grabs the crotches of two guys just standing around the set. She rubs them through their stiffening pants moaning, "Penises," as if commanding them to come out and play.

Stefani is looking at a slideshow on a laptop. The pictures are of her as she slowly strips for the camera. "I like it," she smiles. Dillan is talking about her nipple and clit piercings, how they only hurt when she takes out the jewelry, which she has for the nearing coupling with St. Croix. Dillan suggests Stefani masturbate. "I think it would be hot, but it's not my movie," she seems disappointed. If these girls don't fuck soon their sexual energy will split like an atom and devour the entire studio.

The men are still examining for possible signs of thinning hair when Stefani blurts out, "This is my movie and I still haven't had sex at all!" Thomas has Gia untied and she walks naked off the set, holding her clothing in such a way that they cover nothing. The crew is busy preparing for the day's major sex scene. They ignore her small bust and ample ass as she nonchalantly struts her stuff past them.

Shylar Cobi, the production manager, is constantly on his cell phone. Next week he's working on a pair of films for Vivid's twin porn stars, the Love Sisters. "One gets fucked in the ass and the other feels it," he explains. "The other film is, you know, good twin, bad twin. The bad twin pimps the other out. For twins you have to get creative."

St. Croix grabs his tub of ice water and soaking towels. Dillan is getting makeup applied by one of the tattooed assistants who hogtied Gia. St. Croix is known as a clown on set. He had cast and crew hysterical earlier, improvising as if a stand-up comic during a simple transitional scene, which took over six takes. But as the sex scene is called and the clothing lost, so are the jokes. It's time for business.